“I’m better than Jesus,” says Hannah Cockroft. “I died and came back twice.”
Britain’s wheelchair racer supreme is reflecting, on the eve of the Paris Paralympics, on how she came to be who she is – and how she should not really be here at all.
Within the first 24 hours of her life, Cockroft suffered two heart attacks, the first of which left her lifeless for 20 minutes. When her heart stopped for a second time, doctors feared she would not make it.
Yet here she is, at 32, with seven Paralympic victories and 16 world titles to her name, ParalympicsGB’s golden banker for the Games.
“I got given a third chance at life,” she says. “Why would you not do something with that? I think that thought has always been in me since I was a kid, which sounds really morbid but it just meant I always wanted to do something impressive.
“When I was little and was asked what I wanted to be, I always just said, ‘Famous’. I didn’t care what I was famous for, I just wanted people to know my name. Never in a million years would I have thought of athletics or sport but this is where we are. I just feel so incredibly lucky that this is my life because it could have ended up so differently.”
She will defend her T34 100m and 800m titles in Paris as the hot favourite in both. It is a pressure she has learnt to live with as the dominant force in the sport for more than a decade. The ultimate driven high achiever, she would not have it any other way.
“I know that when we’re on that start line, the target is on my back. I’m the world record holder. I’m the Paralympic champion. I’m the world champion. That’s just the way it is,” she says. “I don’t believe in lining up not wanting the gold.”
Since she catapulted herself into the public consciousness at London 2012, she has only been beaten once at a major championship. That came at the European Championships in Berlin in 2018, when fellow Briton Kare Adenegan pushed her into silver in the 100m.
“There’s sometimes this narrative of, ‘Oh, you always win by miles, so why do you even bother?’ But in my head, every race is close,” she says.
“Kare is a fantastic athlete and she is a threat all the time. She has the ability to beat me. She just needs to step up and do it. I don’t mean that in a mean way. I know she can beat me. But that’s the thing that keeps me going in training. I have to try and beat her.”
‘Every decision he makes is to try to win a Paralympic medal’
Her competitive nature is obvious but there is a softer, more supportive side to Cockroft revealed in Channel 4’s fly-on-the-wall documentary Path to Paris: Paralympic Dreams.
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It shows Cockroft at home in Chester with her fiance Nathan Maguire, a fellow para athlete who won an 800m bronze medal at the World Championships earlier this year. In the documentary she confesses that she would rather he wins a medal in Paris than her.
“I am the only person that sees the work that goes in day in, day out to everything he does. Every decision he makes, every single thing he does is to try and win a Paralympic medal,” she says.
“Just seeing how much that medal meant to him at the World Championships in May – he was smiling more than the gold medalist – it was just amazing.
“I’m constantly telling him, ‘If you believe you can win it, you’ll win it’ and this year something’s changed in him. He’s got brave, he’s got confident and I think that’s going to make a massive difference when we get to Paris. I think it’s his time.”
‘Walking has got more difficult as I’ve got older’
The inflammation of the spinal cord Maguire endured as an eight-year-old means he is paralysed from the waist down. Despite the brain damage suffered during her traumatic beginning, which affected her balance and fine motor skills, Cockroft can stand and walk but not very far – and not as far as she used to.
“I’ve never hidden the fact that I can walk. I’m actually incredibly proud of the fact that I can – it was something that my parents worked hard on when I was a kid,” she says. “But walking has definitely got more difficult as I’ve got older. I’m a lot more reliant on my wheelchair.
“I don’t really leave the house without my wheelchair anymore whereas I used to be able to walk around the supermarket and things like that. I can’t manage that far anymore.
“I can probably stand up for about two minutes and then I’m tired and I need to sit down. I’m terrified if I can ever not stand up, what would happen because it would make both of our lives a lot more difficult.”
‘This is the Games we’ve been waiting for since 2012’
The pair will tie the knot in four weeks but for the time being all her attention is on Paris where ParalympicsGB will attempt to improve on the 124 medals they won in Tokyo, with the help of National Lottery funding that makes it possible.
“It gives you a massive sense of pride that our British public supports us in that way,” she says. “It makes us Paralympians feel equal in a world that is just so not equal.”
Cockroft’s dream, beyond her ambitions for herself and Maguire, is that Paris will end up matching London as a Paralympic spectacle – although with just over half of the 2.8 million tickets sold there is work to do yet.
“I think this is the Games that we’ve been waiting for since London 2012,” she says. “I watched all of the Olympics and that athletics stadium was full all the time. I didn’t see an empty seat. I’m just so, so hopeful that Paris can be the same for us.
“To see the French Paralympic team at the Olympic closing ceremony and to hear the Paris officials say, ‘We’re not done’ gave me goosebumps and made me feel respected as an athlete.”
Path to Paris: Paralympic Dreams is on Channel 4 on Sunday, Aug 25 at 4.55pm.
National Lottery has invested more than £300 million in grass-roots and elite sport.